Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
