Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
