I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
