Just fell off a train. Bad.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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