Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
