we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize
