Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize