brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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