Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
we made out on top of his cat.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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