i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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