He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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