Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
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