her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
