It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
i think i just lost a toe
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
The air taste purple.
Randomize