Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
You're my little dorito
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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