We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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