I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
