I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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