Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
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