I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
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What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
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