Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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