I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
