We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
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