WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Randomize
