The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
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