I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize