I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
