She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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