I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize