Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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