absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
