dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
