Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Randomize