Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Randomize
