If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize