yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
