she was so not down for the gang bang
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
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