i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
