We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
