I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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