How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize
