You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
