My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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