it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
