At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
