so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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