I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize