I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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