And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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