Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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